Aftermath
by Writergirl95
Summary: After Buffy's death Dawn heads down a selfdestructive path, Spike attempts to save his little bit and agrees to take her away from Sunnydale. But will Spike's complicated feelings for her make things better or worse? Note: I can't remember how old Dawn is supposed to be but for this fanfic she is sixteen to avoid underage creepyness.
1. Take me away

The first month after Buffy died Dawn ignored it.

She lived in denial as robo-Buffy took on her slayer tasks. Dawn refused to cry because if she didn't think to hard she could pretend Buffy wasn't really gone.

The fifth month after Buffy died Dawn felt guilty. Buffy had jumped for her, closing the portal that had been opened with her blood so that she could live. Sacrificed herself to save the world in typical Buffy fashion.

"Shallow cuts, shallow cuts" She'd murmur calmly as the razor collided with her soft flesh.

The same words the freak who'd taken a knife to her skin to open the portal had used on the night Buffy had died. When the blood flows the portal would open and it shall close when the blood flows no more. Dawn defiled her body with her razor as punishment, because her blood still flowed, she was still here and Buffy was not.

The eighth month after Buffy died, she was angry.

She was angry with Spike for not stopping the demon from opening the portal in the first place. He was a brilliant fighter but when it counted most he had lost. He fell, Dawn's blood was spilled and Buffy jumped. But she hadn't gotten back up like Spike had, she was dead. Dawn wanted to yell and scream and hit him for not protecting her sister from death. He was supposed to love her god damn it! But when she looked in his eyes she found the guilt she'd wanted to invoke in him already there, so she kept her mouth shut.

The eleventh month after Buffy died Dawn was fed up. The scoobies had coped well. Willow had Tara and Xander had Anya and they floated through their grieving because they had loved ones by their sides. Dawn was not loved, no one held her while she cried. No one noticed when she stole things or cared when her grades slipped. Sure Tara and Willow gave her a quick lecture about how grades were important but they didn't bother to ask her if she needed help studying. They would scold her but they wouldn't help her. Everyone tried to avoid her, the freaky key thing that Buffy died for, thats all she was. Everyone loved Buffy and when Buffy was around that love had extended to Dawn as well. But Buffy was gone now, and Dawn was merely a painful reminder of that.

Spike was the only one that didn't avoid her, hell he was always trying to be around her. But not cause he loved her, not because he cared. But because Dawn was all that's left of his precious Buffy. Dawn was so fed up with all of them, with all of it. It made her disgusted to see the sadness in the scoobies eyes whenever Buffy was mentioned. Whenever she was around Spike she wanted to scream and tell him to snap out of it. Didn't any of the get it? Buffy had jumped. She'd chosen to, not to save the world or even to save her sister. Buffy jumped because she'd been given an easy out. She could jump and end it all, remove the weight of the world from her shoulders, not have to worry about the hole that ached in her heart after her mother's death, not have to go through the exhausting day to day life that she had. So she jumped and everyone said she'd died a hero. Dawn knew it was a lie, Buffy had died a coward. The hardest thing in this world is to live in it. Her sisters words were true, and they were the reason she'd jumped.

Dawn was contemplating all this as she sat in Spike's crypt. He was standing, pouring himself another drink. His eyes were empty. Dawn looked down at the shot glass of liquor in her delicate hand. He allowed her to drink now, he'd given up on preserving any ounce of her innocence when he'd come to check up on her and found her face buried in a boys lap as she elicited pleasurable moans from him with her mouth. Dawn stared at the vampires empty eyes again, he looked as if he'd lost the will to live. It caused anger to boil within her. She threw her glass at him; it missed smashed to pieces against the wall beside his head. It woke him up, anger burning in his empty eyes.

"Snap out of it!" She screamed.

He looked at her, seeming awake for the first time in ages.

"She's gone Spike, she left us and she's not coming back!" The girl said as hot angry tears began to slip down her cheeks.

It hit spike for the first time. He'd spent that last eleven months an empty shell refusing to deal with the fact that she was gone. The truth being that she'd wanted to go. Death is my gift she'd told them and she was right it had been, but it was a gift she'd been happy to give. She was meant to go spike realized and a weight was lifted off his shoulders. For the first time since long before Buffy had died, the slayer haunted him no more. He saw his feelings for what they were, an obsession much like it had been with Dru. He'd wanted her craved for her and when she didn't want him back it drove him mad, like seeing Dru all over Angelus had. But then she was gone and he was lost and confused desperate for closure that wouldn't come. But it hit him now that he'd never loved her and with that realization he could move on. His attention returned to the now sobbing brunette that lay on the floor before him. His poor lil bit, he'd been so caught up in his own grief to care for her in the previous months. She was the only one who ever treated him as an equal with the exception of her mother and he repaid her so poorly.

"Oh god Dawn, I'm so sorry." He said as he approached her quivering body.

He knelt to the ground pulling her into his lap as he held her protectively.

"I'm so sorry bit. It's okay now. I've got you, gonna make everything better now." He murmured into her hair and he held her.

Dawn shook and trembled as so many emotions worked their way through her body. Finally after what seemed an eternity she'd calmed down. She lay there as her sniffles died down in Spike's lap with his hand stroking her hair soothingly.

"I'm so tired Spike" Dawn said with half closed eyes. All the crying had drained her both emotionally and physically.

He stood up carrying her effortlessly in his well-muscled arms and lay her down in his bed.

He covered her in blankets, until she was tucked in right and proper.

He sat down next to her and rubbed her back soothingly until his bit drifted off to sleep.

She awoke cradled in Spike's arms. She inhaled deeply taking in his smell, focusing on how comforting it was to have his strong arms around her, protecting her. He had not joined her under the blankets which told Dawn that he had not meant to fall asleep beside her. Silently, she wriggled away from him and got out of bed careful not to wake him. She crept off to his makeshift bathroom and borrowed some of Spike's mouthwash. She frowned at his lack of a mirror and tried to fix her bedhead blindly. When she was certain she looked acceptable she went back to where Spike slept. He looked peaceful and that made Dawn smile sadly. She wondered if he was dreaming about Buffy, while she stood awake and pining for him. She'd always loved Spike, the only one that treated her as an equal, the only one who cared about her at all. But he was in love with Buffy, just like Xander had wanted Buffy when Dawn was younger and infatuated with her sister's good natured funny friend. Dawn wondered if she should leave. She stepped closer to Spike, her hand tracing his jawline delicately. "Can't you see that I love you?" She asked barely above a whisper. Spike who had been awake since Dawn had risen from the bed, struggled not to open his eyes wide in shock. Before he could process her words or decided how he should react he heard her leaving his crypt.

He sat up alone in his bed trying to understand. Dawn loved him? He knew good and well that she was not a child, not anymore. She was a young women, and at the same time millenniums older than he was. If she said she was in love he took her seriously. He had known about the school girl crush that she'd had for him an eternity ago, but he'd assumed that it had run its course and ended. Spike struggled to understand how this would change things between them. His realizations of the previous night had made it clear that he needed to help her off her self-destructive path, but that would be difficult if he had to worry about leading her on. Would it be leading her on? He knew he loved her, always had. She was his best mate. But his love had always been platonic. Sure he noticed as she'd blossomed into the beautiful young women she was now. He'd observed as she'd developed hips and full breasts and lost the childlike roundness to her features because though he was a demon he was also a man. He was ashamed when he'd have to push away the vulgar thoughts that surfaced when she'd bent down to pick up something and her short skirt struggled not to expose her, or when he'd noticed her nipples protruding through her shirt as he walked her home on a cold night. Because she was Dawn, his little bit. She was precious and delicate and she was something that needed to be taken care of not lustfully ogled at. She was not longer a little girl but that didn't change their relationship he reminded himself. He her friend, it was his place to be her companion and her caretaker and nothing more. He'd already muddled up the taking care of her part so well he couldn't be distracted with all these thoughts of her. He needed to get a clear head and fast.

He went to her house that night to see if she was okay. He was determined not to let her know he'd overheard her whispers that morning in his crypt. But as he'd approached he took notice of the darkened house. It appeared no one was home. He was slumped against the tree waiting when he saw the strange car heading toward the summers house. Hidden in the shadows, he watched intently as a boy got out of the car followed shortly by Dawn. She wore black leather pants and a white tank top, not a lot unlike how faith used to dress. Her lips were adorned in blood red lipstick and her hair was loose long and flowing like a river down her back. Everything from her appearance, to the look in her eyes, to the way she walked into the house was provocative. Spike had no doubt in his mind what she and the strange boy were about to go do.

"Bloody hell." Spike cursed.

Torn between barging in there a pummeling the little prick or stalking home, Spike stood outside as he watched Dawn's bedroom light flicker on, then off again.

Spike made his way up to the roof and outside her window within seconds of making his decision. He couldn't just walk away, knowing what she was doing. Whether his complex feelings for her were platonic or not, he knew he did not like the idea of her whoring around with a slew of boys. It was beneath her, something she'd wound up doing because he had let her sink so low. But Spike was back now awakened by his revelation and he would not tolerate anymore of her promiscuous behavior.

He opened her window effortlessly and slipped through it with ease.

"Dawn" He growled as he crossed the room and threw on the lights.  
Dawn was lying on the bed, topless with the also topless boy on top of her in nothing but his boxers. Spike was relieved to see Dawn still had her pants on, though the boys hand was down the front of them. The boy got off of Dawn startled. Dawn whose eyes at first grew wide with shock now seemed faintly annoyed and not nearly as embarrassed or ashamed as they should be.

Spike glared at the boy, and let out a fierce growl.

"Get out!" Spike snarled as grabbed him by the back of the neck and pulled him out of the room.

Spike tossed the boys clothes after him and then slammed Dawns bedroom door shut. Dawn was now sitting up, her long hair still covering her breasts. Spike turned to face her not exactly sure what he was planning to say. Dawn glared unforgivingly at him, when he replied with no excuse she started in on him.

"What the hell was that for?" She demanded furiously.

"You're not allowed to have boys in your room." Spike said in a low serious tone.

Dawn stood up now, seriously pissed.

"Who are you my mother? Oh wait she'd dead! If you can even count her as my mother I mean big blobs of energy don't really have parents do they?!" She screamed bitterly.

"Besides it's not like you've never caught me with a boy up here before." She spat at him.

Spike remembered the time he'd caught her with a different boy up in this same room of course at the time he'd been so numb he'd just walked in stood there shocked for a few moments as if he was confused and then left. Of course that time she hadn't been half naked as she was now standing in front of him. Spike felt his cock twitch. He was worried he'd might get a full hard on if she didn't cover up with something other than her precariously placed hair.

"For fucks sake, can you put a bloody shirt on?!" Spike yelled at her.

Dawn stood there defiantly for a few moments. Finally she crossed her arms over her chest.

"Why should I this is my room. You're the one who barged in here." Dawn said stubbornly.

She was mad, angry at him for storming in here and telling her what to do. He treated her like an equal, which is why he'd won her respect and why she'd tolerated him for the past few months. Yet now here he was bossing her around like a child. The way all the others had when Buffy was alive. At the same time her body was humming at the whole situation, him there not a metre away from her while she stood there without a shirt; it was something she'd fantasized about many times, though not quite like this. Sure she'd brought another guy up to her room, as she had with a handful of others, but in her mind they were Spike. Every time.

Spike, who was growing increasingly uncomfortable in his pants, frustratedly grabbed the blanket from her bed and wrapped it around her shoulders, covering her.

"Dawn, your better than this, you deserve more than random hookups with strange boys." Spike said softly trying to get her to understand his actions were for her own good.

"You don't know that. You don't even know me! Not anymore, every moment you've spent with me over the past months you've been sulking over Buffy! That's the only reason why you even bother with me is because I remind you of her!" Dawn accused him angrily.

Tears welled up in her eyes and threatened to spill over. Dawn now clutched at the blanket covering her desperately, feeling vulnerable and wishing she could hide her face in it and just disappear.

"Dawn, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry for everything. But it's different now, I'm better now and I'm gonna help ya get better too. I care about you Dawn I do I swear it." He said very seriously.

Because he did care about her, hell she was the only person in this whole bloody planet he cared about.

"Liar." Dawn spat out bitterly. "Just leave me alone."

"Dawn I love you, not the way I thought I loved Buffy. But you are my best mate, the only one I can stand to be around, you treat me with respect and you used to make me laugh, and I used to watch out for you. I want to help you. Get back to how things were."

Dawn felt a confusing round of emotions overwhelm her.

She lingered on the "I thought I loved Buffy". Was he saying he didn't? She wasn't surprised at him saying she was his best friend, she knew that already. She longed for the past too, for a different spike. Who was funny and alive and well she'll admit it a little bad, the one who would make fun of Xander and tell her stories from his past and not be ashamed to be himself. Then there was the fact he'd said he loved her, even if it wasn't in "that way".

"Prove it." Dawn said seriously. She looked him straight in the eyes as she spoke.

"Take my away from here"

Spike stared at her, in her room that was littered with objects with tags on them that had clearly been stolen. Piles of homework left untouched, her shirt and bra on the floor. He looked into her big sad eyes, wet with tears, as she clutched the comforter around her begging him to take her away from this awful place. She had all the vulnerability of a small child and all the wisdom of an old woman when she spoke.

And as soon as the request left her lips Spike knew he would oblige. Because how could she heal in this god-awful town where she'd seen so much pain? Who would even try to stop them from leaving?

In that instant it was settled that they would leave Sunnydale.


	2. Jane Smith

Chapter two: Jane Smith

Dawn saw his thoughts in his eyes as though he'd said them out loud. He would give her what she wanted; take her far away from Sunnydale. Though he had yet to have said it she couldn't stop the smile from forming on her face. She would skip town with Spike, more importantly the new Spike. Not the sulking miserable Spike from the previous months but the Spike that had realized he'd never loved Buffy. This was the Spike that loved her and didn't want her messing around with boys, the Spike that was her best friend.

Spike looked at the smile on Dawns face and wondered if felt as foreign as it looked. Spike could tell by the joy in Dawn's eye that it was a genuine smile. But then why did it appear so strange? Spike realized then that it was the first time he'd seen Dawn smile in months. He felt a pang of guilt. How could he have left her so utterly alone?

"When can we go? Can we leave tonight?" Dawn asked eagerly.

"Bit we need to figure out where to go, you ought to pack and I should probably talk to red and her witchy mate." Spike said as he began to wonder exactly where they should go.

Dawns face fell at his words and Spike felt as though someone had staked him.

"Then again I am the big bad and all, wouldn't be proper to go around planning and being all responsible and what not. There's no thrill in that, no adventure." Spike said with a playful wink.

Dawn's face brightened again.

"I'll go fetch the car, while you get dressed and throw a few things together. Then we'll just pick a place and drive yeah?" Spike asked with a grin.

Dawn nodded enthusiastically she wanted to throw her arms around her favorite vamp but then there would be nothing holding up the blanket. Spike dipped out the window from which he came and Dawn began fluttering around her room ecstatically. She got dressed and then grabbed a large duffel bag throwing an assortment of her favorite clothes and shoes in for an array of different kinds of weather. She threw in the essentials like her hairbrush, toothbrush, and toothpaste a bit of makeup, shampoo and conditioner and a razor. She emptied out her piggy bank which had more than a couple hundred dollars in it since she hadn't paid for anything since Buffy died. She then grabbed her backpack filled it with the spell book she'd gotten for her birthday from Tara and Willow, things she'd stolen from the magic shop that could be handy and a bunch of food for the trip. She scrawled a note out on the table explaining that she'd skipped town with Spike and that she wasn't planning on returning. Then she grabbed her duffel bag and her backpack and stood outside waiting for Spike. He pulled up in his car, with the blacked out windows and Dawn felt giddy with excitement.

"Hop in!" Spike called.

Dawn ran toward the car dumping her bags in the back seat. She couldn't have stopped smiling if she tried. She was leaving Sunnydale and Spike was with her, for the first time she felt hopeful that maybe life wasn't going to be so terrible.

"Where to Nibblet?" Spike asked as he nodded at the large map spread out in front of him.

Dawn looked at it trying to choose a place to go.

"I don't know I want to go everywhere" Dawn said with a sheepish grin.

She focused on the states the farthest away from California.

"New Hampshire sounds nice." Dawns finally decided.

She liked the way it sounded and traveling there would let them see a whole bunch of states in-between.

"We'll get us a nice place in Manchester" Spike agreed with a grin.

"If we head out now we could easily make it to Las Vegas before morning" Spike told her with a raised eyebrow. "It could be a fun pit stop, then after that we could visit the Grand Canyon if ya want"

"Okay! After all we have all the time in the world." Dawn said happily.

Spike didn't know it, but Dawns words were exactly true. Giles had called Dawn one night from England and told her that upon more researching into her unique circumstances, what with her being a key and all, it was highly likely that she would be immortal due to the fact that she was made from such strong magical energy. At first the thought freaked her out, but she'd gotten used to it after a while. After all wasn't it every woman's dream to stay forever young and pretty? Besides it was kinda cool that she could get the whole immortal thing and not have to give up her soul. It was after that discovery that she'd taken up magic. She wanted to understand it, how it worked, she wanted to be able to use it and well if she was going to be around forever she seriously needed a hobby.

They drove for hours radio blasting, Dawn with the map and Spike at the wheel. Around four in the morning they had made it to Las Vegas and they used the remaining hours of nightfall to find a hotel to stay in for the day. Once they had checked in Dawn was ready to pass out, but she tried to stay up a little longer since she knew if she was going to be living with Spike she'd have to learn to sleep during the day and stay up at night. Spike stared at Dawn all sleepy eyed as he opened his cooler and took out a packet of blood.

"You need a bite to eat Bit?" Spike asked.

"No I'm fine" Dawn said with a smile as she sprawled out on the bed.

The hotel room had two beds; Spike didn't want to risk any weirdness between them by repeating the mistake of sleeping together like they had in his crypt. When the sun was just about up Dawn disappeared into the bathroom to brush her teeth and change into her pjs. Spike who typically slept naked realized that with Dawn sleeping a mere few feet away from him that was no longer an option. Tonight he would sleep in his jeans and t-shirt and he would figure out what to wear tomorrow. Dawn came out of the bathroom in an oversized t-shirt that went down to about mid-thigh. Spike inhaled deeply despite his lack of a need to breath.

"I hate to break this to you Bit, but I think you forgot pants" Spike said trying to seem jokingly casual.

Fact was, it was distracting as hell to be around her when she was constantly half naked all the time.

"This is how I always sleep" Dawn replied innocently.

"Right well. Never mind then" Spike stammered.

"Okay…" Dawn said shooting Spike a weird look.

Dawn wondered why he was acting like a weirdo all of a sudden.

The two of them fell asleep that night with each other on their minds.

Dawn awoke around twilight; Spike was snoring softly in his bed. She was eager for the night's activities, exploring Las Vegas and all the fun they would have while doing so. She grinned to herself as she got up and began to get ready. Spike got out of bed mere minutes after her. He watched Dawn excitedly getting ready while he drank some more blood from his cooler.

"You do realize that all the real fun is strictly for those of us over the age of twenty one in Vegas yeah?"

Dawn shot Spike a look, "You do realize I'm millenniums older than you yeah? Besides you're supposed to be the big bad, are you really saying you can't get me a decent fake ID?" She asked him in a sassy tone.

"Well we'll have to get you fixed up right and proper if anyone will buy it, millenniums older or not you still look sixteen." Spike said with a grin.

This was not true in any sense; Dawn looked far closer to nineteen then sixteen. Hopefully with the help of makeup and the right clothes they could pass her off as twenty one.

"You order yourself something from room service; I'll go find you an ID." Spike said as he pulled on his leather duster.

Dawn bounced onto the bed and began perusing through the room service menu, she wondered how long before they were going to run out of money but she pushed the thought away.

An hour or so later Spike returned telling her he'd found a guy, and that they could head out as soon as she was ready.

Dawn stepped out of the bathroom and Spikes eyes went wide. One thing is for sure, she definitely looked twenty one.

"What?" Dawn asked self-consciously, after seeing Spike's expression.

Dawn was wearing a shiny gold halter top that showed off an impressive amount of cleavage and left the majority of her back bare, paired with a pair of tight black pants and gold heels. She wore her hair as usual letting flow down her back in subtle waves. Her makeup enhanced her features and added maturity to her face. Her eyelashes looked a mile long and her full lips were a shade darker than her natural pink and slicked with gloss.

"Nothing, you just look different is all..." Spike stammered. "Where did ya get the cloths from?" He asked because she couldn't have packed that in her suitcase.

"Pants came from my suitcase, the top and shoes I bought across the street." Dawn said as she looked down to admire its glittery fabric which could only be pulled off in Vegas.

"You ready to go?" She asked eagerly.

Spike nodded focusing hard not to let his eyes linger on her breasts. After they had retrieved Dawn's ID they headed towards one of the many casinos.

"Now Spike you do know they don't gamble with kittens here right?" Dawn teased.

"Yes Jane, I know" Spike said with a slight grin.

"What?" Dawn asked confused.

Spike slid his hand into Dawn's back pocket and retrieved her ID, the feeling of his hand there made Dawn's heart start beating fast which she prayed he didn't hear. He did of course but ignored it. He pointed to the name beside Dawn's picture.

"Jane Smith." Dawn read aloud.

"That's your name." Spike said.

Dawn nodded trying to imagine herself as Jane. She decided that it was a fine enough name as far as names went. Spike however couldn't imagine Dawn as some plain baby Jane in a million years, but still it would do for now. The two of them entered the casino and Spike watched with a smile as Dawns eyes lighted up.

"So Jane, what shall we do first?" Spike asked her with a devilish grin.


	3. Drunken ramblings and hungover fights

Chapter three: Drunken ramblings and hangover fights.

The two of them made their way through the casino; Spike acquired a decent amount of money by cheating at black jack but they really hit the jackpot on a slot machine that Dawn was playing on.

Dawn grinned ear to ear, with the amount of money they had now they would be set for quite a while, they could stay in five star hotels, eat out at restaurants, do basically anything they pleased and still have some left for when they settled down in New Hampshire.

"Way to go pet" Spike murmured in Dawns ear.

The feeling of Spike's lips made her shiver and her cheeks flushed lightly.

"Let's go somewhere to celebrate" Dawn suggested.

The two of them headed to a night club, the music was loud, the club was busy, and the air was thick and hot. But Dawn loved it. She felt alive with electricity; the whole thing was so surreal to her. Dawn couldn't seem to wrap her head around the fact that this was real, that she was clubbing with Spike in Las Vegas. For the first time her crazy life, was crazy in the most amazing way.

"Let's dance!" Dawn had to raise her voice to be heard over the music.

"I don't dance!" Spike said with a chuckle and a shake of his head.

Spike much preferred sitting by the bar drinking then wiggling around on the dance floor.

"Come on please!" Dawn said pouting out her bottom lip.

"That's not going to work Nibblet." Spike told her.

Instead of raising her voice Dawn put her lips to his ear the way he had done to her earlier.

"Suit yourself." She said, her hot breath tickling his earlobe.

She winked at him before she made her way to the dance floor, she moved with the music like she was one with it, dancing came so naturally to her. Spike once again found himself struggling to keep his thoughts about her PG. This was Dawn, his little bit, he had to pull himself together and get over his attraction to her if they were going to remain friends.

She doesn't want to be your friend. A voice in the back of his head reminded him.

Spike downed a round of shots, trying to avoid dealing with the problem that was growing.

Dawn loved Him, and he…well he didn't know how he felt about her. He loved her, but he wasn't sure if it was in the way she did. Sure he was attracted to her, seriously, overwhelming, increasingly attracted to her he thought as he watched her dancing with some prick.

But that's not the point! He tried to focus.

He loved her and he was attracted to her…but.

But what? He asked himself. He'd been avoiding the obvious truth. He loved her always had. He wanted what was best for her and for her to be safe and happy. And now his feelings were no longer platonic. But that didn't make them wrong did it? Not if she wanted him that way too right? He tried to sort through his thoughts that were becoming increasingly muddled with alcohol. He knew he lusted for her, but did he want to be with her? He imagined holding her hand, kissing her cheek, being her boyfriend. He realized he wanted it, bloody hell he wanted more than that. He wanted to be her future. But they would never have a future he reminded himself, because he was immortal and she wasn't. He was darkness and she was meant to live in the light. It dawned on him that taking her away, having her sleeping all day, avoiding the sun as if she was a soulless monster too was wrong. Cruel even, as much as he wanted he wasn't good for her.

He signaled the bar tender to give him another round of shots. He downed them all in seconds, and signaled him for yet another. By the time Dawn had gotten back to the bar he was full on wasted.

"Whoa, drink much Spike?" Dawn asked with a giggle.

Spike responded by taking a shot.

Dawn picked one up and took it.

"Holy! That's strong!" She stammered, the alcohol burning her throat.

Spike was mumbling something or other but Dawn couldn't understand a word he was saying. He seemed quite upset about something.

"What?" Dawn asked.

Spike mumbled some more. Dawn struggled to understand but between the blaring music and his slurred speech she was failing miserably.

"I can't understand you!" She said raising her voice.

"Bloody hopeless it is..." Spike his eyes staring sadly at his shot.

He took it and asked the bartender for more.

"I think you've had enough pal" He told him taking in Spike's appearance.

"SoodUf!" Spike spat angrily. Dawn was fairly sure he was telling the bartender to sod off.

Dawn was perplexed she'd never seen Spike like this; he was usually so good at holding his liquor.

Dawn smiled apologetically at the bartender. "Let's go back to the hotel Spike" She said trying to help him off his stool.

They had walked to the club, but Dawn wasn't sure if Spike was capable of walking back. She pulled out her cellphone and called a taxi.

"Why we leaving?" Spike asked seeming confused.

"It's time to go home" Dawn said meaning the hotel.

Spike looked as though he might cry and started babbling on about light and dark and taking her back where she belonged.

"What?" Dawn asked growing concerned. Was he saying she should go back to Sunnydale?

"I'm can't be it. Not good for you..stupid burning." He explained.

She was still confused. The taxi arrived and she helped Spike into it. She sat up in front a growing feeling of unease in her stomach. She shelled out some money from her purse and handed to the drive when they arrived. Spike was passed out in the back and the driver; a friendly middle aged man helped her get Spike to their room. She handed him another bill and thanked him for his help. Dawn took off Spike's boots and duster and pulled the blankets over him. Dawn removed her shoes, she wanted to crash in her cloths but the halter and tight jeans were anything but comfortable. She stripped down to her underwear and just slept it that, she'd wake up before Spike anyway; she was too lazy to dig up her Pjs from her suitcase.

When she awoke she still felt groggy she hadn't slept well and was still put off by Spike's weirdness the night before. She turned her head to see Spike passed out in his bed. Dawn got up and slipped on her t-shirt and a pair of sweats. She quietly ordered room service because she was hungry. The clock indicated that it was late afternoon. After eating she figured she'd go out and get some Tylenol and some fresh blood if she could find a butcher for when Spike woke up. She left a note and left the hotel room quietly. She had to drive Spike's car in order to locate a butcher, she'd driven before but she didn't technically have her license so she prayed she wouldn't get pulled over. She still felt uneasy as she was driving back to the hotel after retrieving the blood. Would Spike remember last night? Would he explain what he had meant? Was he going to send her back? She entered the room slowly. Spike was face first in a pillow. He heard the door click shut and he grunted to let her know he was awake. Dawn set some blood and the Tylenol and the night stand.

"That should help with the hangover" Dawn said softly.

Spike lifted his head from his pillow; his hair was a mess and Dawn probably would have swooned over how attractive he was if she wasn't so worried.

"Thanks" He grumbled before swallowing the pills.

Dawn perched on the edge of her bed.

"You remember last night?" She asked hesitantly.

Spike nodded silently.

"What was all that gibberish about?" Dawn felt bad for badgering him with questions seconds after waking up but she needed to know.

"Nothing just drunken ramblings" Spike tried to assure her. It didn't work.

"All that rambling on about light and dark and how I don't belong with you? That meant nothing?" She asked her voice shaky.

Spike wanted to kick himself; he'd been a bloody idiot last night.

"Just worried about you is all, it's important for you humans to be all about in the sunshine and what not" Spike struggled to explain. "You're not like me Dawn, you're not a monster."

"You want to send me back?" Dawn said angry tears beginning to prick her eyes.

"No...It's just I don't know if this is right…I just." Spike didn't know what the right answer was and his head was hurting too much for him to think straight.

"I knew it! You're just like all the others. Finally realized I'm not Buffy have you?" She gave a bitter laugh.

"Dawn that's not it! I just want what's best for you!" Spike said frustrated.

"Whatever, you know what I'm not your problem anymore!" Dawn said grabbing her things and shoving them in her suitcase.

Spike's head was screaming in agony from the shouting.

"Dawn can you just wait a god damn minute!" He snarled grabbing her arm violently and shoving her against the wall.

Dawn let out a cry of pain from Spike's strength. Spike realizing what he had down began to curse.

"Fuck, see this is what I mean! I'm a monster Dawn! I'm an immortal evil creature of darkness. You are a fragile innocent human. It isn't healthy for you to be with me, it's dangerous!"

A spell escaped Dawn's lips and Spike went flying across the room hitting into a wall and then sliding onto the floor.

"I am not fragile, I'm not innocent, and I'm immortal." Dawn spat. "But you know what, it's doesn't matter because I'm leaving" She grabbed her suitcase and slammed the door behind her.

Spike was left completely in shock, confused and with a major migraine.


End file.
